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MESSAGE TITLE:
“Forgiveness That Isn’t Wholeness”
SCRIPTURE TEXT:
2 Samuel 14
Theme: The Danger of Reconciliation Without Healing
DATE: May 13, 2025
BY: EFFIONG ETOK
Carrier of God’s Word
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:
“Distance may be broken by invitation, but healing only happens through confrontation.”
INTRODUCTION
Child of God,
There’s a kind of forgiveness that looks like peace from a distance-but is war in the heart.
There’s a kind of reconciliation that hugs you in public… but still bleeds behind closed doors.
That’s where David and Absalom were.
Yes, David allowed him back.
Yes, the gates of Jerusalem opened.
But the gates of David’s heart? They stayed closed.
And when a father’s arms stay folded, a son’s heart grows cold.
And when wounds are left untreated-they don’t just stay…
They fester.
MAIN MESSAGE
“So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, and saw not the king’s face.” – 2 Samuel 14:28
Two years!
Same city. Same palace. Same family…
No conversation. No eye contact. No closure.
We call it peace-but it’s tension in disguise.
We say we’ve moved on-but our hearts are stuck in what we didn’t talk about.
David forgave Absalom’s crime-but he didn’t confront the pain.
Absalom came back physically-but the relationship never came back emotionally.
And what couldn’t be healed in private… became rebellion in public.
How many marriages today look like Jerusalem?
Sleeping in the same house… but haven’t talked in months.
You eat at the same table-but your hearts are living in different countries.
You say, “I’m fine.”
But deep down, you’re Absalom-present, but disconnected.
Or you’re David-smiling in public, but broken in silence.
Some of you forgave your father, but never told him how his silence crushed you.
You forgave your ex, but never grieved the betrayal.
You forgave the church that wounded you-but you still sit in the back row, disconnected.
Child of God, forgiveness is not the same as healing.
You can release someone with your mouth and still carry their offense in your soul.
David never had the hard conversation.
He never said, “Son, you killed your brother-but I killed our connection.”
And because nothing was confronted-Absalom rebelled.
Bitterness grew.
Revenge was born.
And love that was never spoken… was buried in battle.
REFLECTIONS QUESTIONS
1. Have I been calling avoidance “peace” while my heart is still bleeding?
2. Who have I allowed near my space-but not near my heart?
3. Is God asking me to confront, not just forgive?
TAKEAWAY STATEMENT
Forgiveness without healing is like opening a door but refusing to embrace. Proximity without vulnerability is still exile.
PRAYER POINTS
1. O Lord, heal every place where I’ve reopened the door, but never addressed the wound. Let my reconciliation be whole, not hollow!
2. Father, deliver me from silent grudges! Break the spirit of emotional distance in every divine relationship You gave me, in Jesus’ Mighty Name!
3. Any bitterness growing where healing should’ve happened-Lord, uproot it! Don’t let what I refused to confront become a rebellion in my life, in Jesus’ Mighty Name, Amen!
